Dear Mr. Right,

I hope you are preparing yourself  to receive all my love for you well. It is not simple love, it is like a tsunami and will swallow you if you are not well prepared to receive it. While we work on the part where you receive my love , here are a few things i would like you to know,  not that its a script i want you to follow, but it would ease your life by helping you love me right.  I want you to accept me and embrace my weird ! Trust me that is not an easy task. i have those days where i forget to take my medicine and its on such days that i need and want you to understand me most.


I want you to touch me mindlessly while the two of us watch a movie – i  don’t want that ‘Netflix and Chill’ touching, where the movie is clearly just a pretext to do something else. I want  you to drag your fingers lightly along my arm, in my hair, on my hand. I want to know that you want to touch me as a matter of habit, as a reflex that just feels more right than doing nothing at all. Touching should become second nature, not always a means to an end.

I want you to surprise me , but not with some grand gesture you saw in a movie. I don’t need the you lighting a hundred candles in the shape of a heart or a cheesy word, and i  don’t need to be serenaded with soft guitar music. I need something that is romantic to just the two of us, exactly to our definition. Surprise me with a bacon egg and cheese and coffee on a Saturday morning after I’ve been working hard all week. Surprise  me  with a room that’s full of board games, so you can finally see who’s actually better at this winning thing over some tea or orange juice. Pick a movie that you know i love more than anything, even if i have  already seen it a dozen times, and set up a movie night around it. Let me  know that you notice the little things.

I want you to say that you love me, at weird, random moments when no one would expect it. I want your words to feel like a kiss on my forehead in the dark, something i can barely feel but which i absolutely need to feel is there. I want your love to be something fluid and effortless, not built around “big moments” you feel obligated to mark. Sure, there can be special events, but there’s something a thousand times more heart-swoony about hearing a quiet “I love you” when i have my face mask and bathrobe on, when i think i am at my least lovable, when it’s the last thing i expect.

I want you to love me just as much in front of your friends. I want you to kiss my cheek, to joke with me, to be the exact same way around them as i am around you. I never want to feel like the girlfriend who has to be dragged around, like i am an anchor to all of the fun you would otherwise be having. I hear the way other guys can talk about their girlfriends when they’re not around, like their relationship is an obligation. I know it would sound needy to ask, but  i want to know that you are never like that with me.

I want to get a letter from you, to be surprised that you remembered something that i didn’t, to hear the words “I already took care of it.” There is nothing more wonderful than knowing that someone else has already been putting in the thought, that you were on their mind enough to commit it to writing or make real plans. Because that’s the real romance that’s been dying – the romance of being thoughtful, the romance of taking your time and doing things right. I don’t want to be the thing you remember only when it’s late and you don’t want to sleep alone. I don’t want to be the one you come over to ,to pretend to watch a movie with, just so you can spend a few hours in my arms. I want to be the one you plan ahead for, the one you take a few extra minutes to make things special for. I don’t want your money or the things you can buy me, not that they wouldn’t matter, but i want your time. i want your attention. Did i mention i love flowers and i listen to the language of gifts and Physical touch? I want all that and more.

I want your patience, in a world where everyone is going way too fast.

Inspired by Charlotte Greene 🙂

Comments (30)

  1. This made me teary. You just expressed what i want, love, need but hadn’t put in words. How i dislike grand gifts that clearly aren’t thought through!!! I’d rather be gifted with badly prepared katogo that mr has made beforehand coz he knows i had a long day at work and would need a bite when i get home

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